Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of The Dead
by The Army Dog Gaming Fan
Summary: A kinda good thing i wrote if you like it i will continue any feedback is good feedback thank you enjoy more to come i have mixed this up with some skulduggery characters and some of my made up ones want any characters in the next chapter just ask in the reviews
1. prologue

Skultomb

Guns and streams of energy were blazing into people. This is what everyone feared the dead came back into earth they swarmed around the operatives " we need help these things are destroying the Irish sanctuary "

He was saying it at his house live on global link waiting for a response " hmm ok I will send some of my people " it was of cause English Sanctuary, then from the Australian Sanctuary. " yes we will be there in a sec where will we meet detective?"

" The forbidden land "

the forbidden land got that name after the massacre of 1731 which left 2000 mages dead.

Ok everyone who wants to help meet us there. Skullduggery ended the global link.

I hope they come he thought.

2 hours later

A helicopter with BIF arrived Skulduggery didn't know what BIF was maybe Best Interesting Friends? When they came out Skulduggery said " I don't believe we met?"

" Well I am Stalker Tomb one of Australia's most powerful mages and the best alive and this is my English friend Anthony Chaos he is a known ally for Australia. We are expecting Vicki Ripper and Alice Springs within the hour, I am sure you know Billy ray sang…"

" Yes we are in a very bloody friendship "

"Really?"

"No"

" Yes if we encounter him we will **NOT** kill him"

Skulduggery's gun didn't waver when he aimed it at Tomb's face

" Mind telling me why?"

" We signed a truce me and the Australian Sanctuary with him and the Americans we won't kill him if he gives something to us."

" Gives you what?"

" The Black Cleaver and 75% of all of his payouts"

" That is insane "

" Well we can leave you here pleasant and let you die and withdraw all help" tomb said anger flaring

" Tomb you probably know that I really hate people like you"

" Mages?"

"Pieces of…."

To be continued


	2. A man is chaos

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of The Dead

Chapter 2

Stalker Tomb and Chaos was taken into Skulduggery's house Skulduggery was looking very proud but Tomb was asking him self-why_ am I in his house wasn't it destroyed by Guild before he was captured?_

" ah ah no taking photo's " Skulduggery said smiling but fell quiet soon after realizing his mistake that he didn't have a camera

" So uh where is Valkyrie Cain" Chaos asked staring at his hat made by bespoke.

Tomb is a rare mage that can use more then one discipline so one of his many techniques is he can see the mind also known as a sensitive, but he only uses a small aspect of it called think speak or thinkaspeco invented by a Italian mage named Antonio vigile or vigilante in English. _Skul Chaos is a sensitive that has one and only power. He can manipulate our minds this isn't your house it was destroyed remember? He is leading us to the dead it's a trap._ Skulduggery nodded at him.

" Well why should I tell a it that is missing his lungs " Skulduggery said taking his revolver out of his holster and aiming at his eyes.

Skulduggery fired and Chaos screamed but he healed quickly and Tomb knew what he really was

" Oh hell" Tomb knew but his anger was fresh and was 100 percent real.

The undead rushed at Skulduggery trying to get him first because they know " _Yo can't kill what is already dead _"

The undead did not give him a chance to stand up, but the undead fell as Stalker Tomb was shooting them from their eyes to their feet, while Skulduggery Fought like normal brutal and physical just like he was taught by one of Tomb

Uncle that Tomb found out of someone special

_Skulduggery's _oldest brother

To be continued…


	3. Meeting The New Girl

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of the dead

Chapter 3

" Hmm good job Pleasant you killed 1 hehe " Tomb said smiling in a sadistic sort of way.

" So where of to now Roarhaven"? Tomb asked.

" No bu.." Skulduggery said just before a sword cut him off that slashed Tomb's throat luckily it missed Tomb so he got out his sickle and put it to the intruder's throat.

" I am so..rry I did..n't mean to attack you."

" What are you doing with Tanith sword? " Skulduggery asked?

" Well… I am with the English sanctuary and she… attacked uhh um " then a scream took her head."

" Who the hell is this guy skul? " the killer said

" Oh Tanith this is Tomb, Tomb meet Tanith " Skulduggery said smiling.

" oh you dat um remnant? Oh yeah you were in Gordon's books weren't ya?" Tomb said in a warm and fuzzy way.

Tanith really liked his hair the way it shinned and glimmered in the sun. But then those words haunted her

_Ghastly is Dead._

To be continued


	4. The Raid

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of The Dead

Chapter 4

Night had approached quickly. Skulduggery and Tanith were following Tomb into his house. Skulduggery noticed it was very protective with guards, cannons and traps everywhere

" What are those guards?" Tanith asked

" Special ops guards les dispositifs protecteurs.

Which is French for protective guards made by one of my ancestors they are great in a fight can self heal shoot guns and they can make bullets grow on trees " tomb said.

Tomb decided to think speak to Tanith.

_Tanith I know you don't trust me but you have to if we are going to live. Ghastly was a great man fought beside him on many occasions. Anyway I brought you here for one thing I will help you guys find Valkyrie Cain._

_Tomb brought them to his operations room filled with cameras of outside and a desk in the middle with papers on them about a war._

" So does anyone know where Valkyrie Cain is because we need to recover her now" Tomb said starting the conversation.

" Well that is what we don't know" Skulduggery said.

" Well I do " she is being held in a gaol in Sydney I am planning to attack in a couple of hours." Tomb said.

" Wait Tomb there is people outside " Tanith said

" The un-dead QUICKLY EVERYONE FOLLOW ME" tomb shouted.

They followed him to the armory where he ordered 20 of his guards to follow, guide and protect. Tomb and Skul ran outside side-by-side they threw fireballs and was shooting their guns. Tomb even got out his sickle and started a head count

"To many of them let the guards do the work call the cleavers I don't want any casualties of my guards and hurry up detective." Tomb shouted.

The Cleavers came and finished them off. But Tanith and Skulduggery saw the other army in front of them.


	5. YOU BLUDGER

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of the dead

Chapter 5

**Thank you for everyone reading this 50 views wow I feel very proud of this can we get 100 by Monday? Now I think we know that Tomb and Pleasant are going horribly Tanith joining the crew and Valkyrie in some gaol and basically no foreign help whatsoever anyway back to da show of shows (did not copy from WWE)**

" Ah that was fun but easy," Tomb said

"Tomb LOOK NOW" Skulduggery said Pointing in front of them.

An army.

Of Mortal mercenaries

" Everyone only use guns don't use magic I will call my snipers everyone lock and load Tanith if you want you can use your Sword, do not let them take anything or steal something. Most of The things here are worth billions and if those assholes get it I will kill those addicts myself."

"FIRE" said a merc and all 100 of the mercs fired their guns into the barricade Tomb Quickly made before the bullets would barrage into them.

Skulduggery Nodded to a guy with nothing by a kukri he looked at Skulduggery and his crew disappeared. "Do they have cloaking spheres?" Tanith asked

" No they aren't magic it is the suit that makes them invisible we stole a prototype from the US government and now the government forgot about the project and now we have heaps of them." Tomb replied.

" So don't they know about the secret?" Skulduggery said.

" Well yes but they used to be magic but after some faceless ones fanatics raided this and they got hit by a big as hell energy ball and they needed to take their magic for them to live. They are still good and efficient and can kill mages quite easily do you know they have killed cleavers before. Well this was before I was recruited by Australian sanctuary"

Skulduggery and Tanith didn't reply and Tomb Shrugged. Tomb raced to where the mercs were attacking and jumped over them and when his fists clench the area he was in was in slow motion and he lazily took out his sword and started a head count " 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 hehe that is what you get ya bludger don't mess with this aussie ya flamin drongo go back to what ever sewers you came from you dumb pieces of flesh and organs."

Then time returned to normal and Tomb just looked at them.

"That is how we do in Australia."

To be Continued….


	6. Val's Coming Home

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of the Dead

**Author's Notes:**

**Well Hello it's me the Army Dog and thanks for 100 views for this amazing story and 150 plus views for my other little 1 shots IN ONLY 3 days anyway have a great Easter I hope all the chocs are good ones ** **DEDICATED TO DEADGIRL19 Also this might not be so good for little people and it might make you sad I am sorry I do (I am joking I want you to cry) anyway enjoy.**

The room was dark and quiet they had laid Ghastly Bespoke's body on the table. Tomb had a starburst in her hand he gave it to Skulduggery. He put it on Ghastly's pale chest. I beeped then it beeped louder and louder then. Ghastly sat up " Ravel? Where is Ravel he is the Traitor him and mist and the black cleave-" he was interrupted by a big warm hug from Tanith.

"Thank god you are here Ghastly don't worry Ravel is dead but we need to get Valkyrie Cain from the gaol in Sydney, Australia." Tanith Said.

"Ok when are we calling Fletcher?" Tomb said.

"Right now" Skulduggery replied.

Fletcher teleported right in front of Tomb, head butting him.

"Hehe um sorry" Fletcher said. Smiling

But Tomb didn't laugh no he throw a right hook right into his gut. " Now we are all settled we can go get Valkyrie".

" So who is staying here?" Tanith asked.

"To do what?" Fletcher asked.

" I don't know maybe DEFEND IRELAND FROM THE BLOODY ZOMBIES?" Tanith said angrily.

" Guys don't worry Alice Springs, Vicki Ripper and China Sorrows are defending. Also don't forget Scapegrace." Tomb Said Beaming with energy.

" What type of drink makes him feel like this?" Tanith Whispered to Skulduggery.

" I don't know maybe water. Yes it is water."

They linked arms and teleported to Sydney and Tomb brought a map out of his pocket while it un-folded it Skulduggery said " Ok of cause we are going to be stealthy but in reality that won't happen It might get bloody but I am sure we have Fletcher trained in fight training right?" Skulduggery a nod came his way and he continued " Ok she will be of cause heavily guarded but Tomb why did they take her to jail in the first place? Please tell me not about the Darquesse thing." Skulduggery said looking at Tanith.

" Well no it was because of some Child of the Spider set her up for killing Ravel." Tomb said

" Really is that true? Fletcher stop eating all the chocolate eggs." Skulduggery said

Fletcher sheepishly slowly stopped eating the Easter eggs. " So they didn't blame it on assassins hmm interesting. Everyone ready? Everyone nodded so they ran to where the entry was not underground it was in an old mansion that said for sale on it though no one has tried to buy it. Tomb passed a silenced gun to Fletcher " 3 shots to the chest one shot for a headshot, 50 bullets in there so 5 reloads and only kill when I say this " Jolly good and I nod at you. You got it?" Fletcher nodded.

They walked in and saw a gigantic cork hat and Tomb turned it a Microphone appeared "it's me mates it is Ya Elder Tomb. With Detective Pleasant we have a meeting with Grand Mage Bloodstains. " Then the Floor shook and they fell into a pit which was the entry to the Australian Sanctuary they were welcomed by the administer called ShockerTop a tunneler and is one of the greatest symbol magic mages of all time but differently the best in the southern hemisphere. They barged past everyone but when they went past the Grand Mages office that was when trouble risen, Cleavers were attacking. Skulduggery was throwing punches and Tanith was jumping and all sorts of fancy kick and punch. Stalker Tomb did a front flip and kicked the Cleaver in the head and his head forgot about being attached to his neck and fell off and hit another cleaver he didn't get up. " Tomb follow me to the gaol" Fletcher shouted.

Fletcher Shot anyone that got close there were only mages there now, they saw the entrance to the gaol. They could see Valkyrie the relief on her face was strong and she looked 24 or something so Fletcher must be early 30's or late 20's when Tomb opened the door for Valkyrie she was attacking anyone that got near it almost looked like she was as good as Tanith. While Valkyrie wasn't looking someone threw a fireball into Fletcher's Chest he stumbled he was on one knee and was trying to hide his pain but failed. A Cleaver came out of nowhere and sliced Fletcher's throat. When Valkyrie looked at him he barely said " hey Val guess what? I am meeting Steph again." He fell to the Floor clutching his throat.

Valkyrie Shadow Walked to a secure location and started to cry.


	7. Down by the harbor

Skulduggery Pleasant: Return of the dead

Chapter 7

**Author's Note**

**250 views Yes we did it am sorry about last chapter I made people sad but that is fine I will be welcoming some new people into this story if you can call them " people" hahahahaha ALL rights of characters go to Derek. (except of stalker tomb and john bloodstains) the plot is made by me naturally and it always will be now every chapter I will be asking 1 question about this chapter get it right you will get a short story dedicated to you about what ever character you choose if it's your own mine or derek's the question is: What book is the Sydney harbor in? Clue1: it has Fletchyrie and is not in LSODM and books AFTER THAT TIMELINE. Enjoy the chapter thank you for 300 views holy crud**

" Guys where is Val" Skulduggery said.

" She Shadow walked out of here when Fletcher died " Tomb said

" I know where she is, " Tanith said.

" Down by the harbor. "

They raced to the harbor, only Skulduggery got out. " Everyone stay here" Skulduggery walked to Valkyrie. " Hey Val what's wrong I know about fletch.

" He didn't deserve that…but Skulduggery?"

" What is it?"

" Can I speak with Tomb?"

" How do you know him?"

" I met him in the Australian Sanctuary while you were with the faceless ones. "

" Ok then if you want to shoot him tell me," Skulduggery said softly.

Skulduggery Walked up to Tomb and said " Val wants to talk to you."

Tomb walked down the steps and thought _what have I done is she going to kill me she knows it is not my fault. _" Hello Val you wanted to talk to me?"

" Yes I did I wanted to tell you a secret. "

" Ok sure go ahead"

" I was going to ask Fletch out possible marry and now he's dead I… don't know what to do now."

" If we survive tonight I will show you something." Tomb said.

They walked back the car " ok let's go" Valkyrie said.

" I was thinking we need 2 more people if we are going to survive China and Dexter, hmm it might be better if we get all the dead men" Ghastly said quietly.

" Ok so where da hell is shudder I know his hotel comes here Skul can I drive?" Tomb asked.

" I would rather murder Valkyrie"

" Isn't that a bit extreme " Valkyrie said

Everyone accept tomb and Skulduggery started laughing. Tomb got out of the car everyone stopped and looked at him Skulduggery put the window down " Where the Hell are you going?"

" I am getting in my Car Pleasant"

" Ha your car bet it goes 50 KPH "

" No I does not I would say maybe 250 KPH but you were close. Here it comes now."

Coming out of a driveway a Bugatti Veyron Super Sport only 50 left in the world. Tomb jumped in " Skulduggery I hope we don't cross paths again because if I do…." Tomb left in black smoke.

Tomb dialed the number he immediately picked it up " G'day mate how you doin?" " Your Aussie slang and your Texas drawl don't mix."

" You ain't doin great yourself Tex" "So you put the tracker on their Bentley." " Yes Billy ray I did." " You sure you don't want me to hurt ya nephew?" " Go for it that nephew of mine never understood." " Remnants ready?" " Yes so the pick me up god dam it and let's attack da sword lady and lil darlin."

Tomb picked up Billy-ray. " That dead body of yours looks mighty disturbin"

" Yeah but it will work " Stalker replied.

Ok just follow the tracker it will lead right to them. After 10 minuets of driving he found them. " Oh hello everyone you guys goin good." "You are under arrest "

" And your possessed " pointing at Valkyrie.

Darquesse opened her eyes.


	8. Darkness is Coming part one

Skulduggery Pleasant Return of the dead.

Chapter 8

**What a Chapter eh don't worry the new people coming into my stories are will be getting a short story telling you all about them. For now I am thinking about 2 more chapters before I either take a break or make a new story. I didn't really want to have Stalker Betray the group neither I wanted the remnants involve as well as Darquesse but if I don't see it coming you would never dream of it. Oh and the Question for this chapter is (better get your nerd glasses on) I will introduce 1 person and you have to tell me what game and/or book they are from. Ok let's go.**

" Bloody hell I now regret this why did I listen to him" Sanguine said.

Ezio was lucky and it wasn't because of he's epic name it was because he found the group the world had been looking for. The Dead Men and now they are here he could arrest them take them to the Sanctuary get the reward get rich. He Parked next to them uhh sanguine was there too he might get double. " This is Ezio Gunman you there man?"

" YES I CAN HEAR YOU- IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE YMCA IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE YMCA YAY" The Dancing Gunman said.

Darquesse was floating the air and starting doing the Macarena. Then Skulduggery Shot her and immediately took out a Starburst it beeped and Valkyrie came back.

" That was too easy thank god your back" Skulduggery hugged her.

" Where is Sanguine?"

" He escaped."

" Guys there is something going global link it is called Tomb VS Sanguine it looks like he is fight Sanguine."

" I knew he wasn't a Traitor" Valkyrie said

Sanguine was mad he's own son is trying to kill him and dogging kicks and punches. At the same time they both brought out their weapons Sanguine had his straight razor and his god killer dagger. Tomb had his Kukri and his hidden blades. But only Tomb's magic was the only thing he was worried about. He could turn invisible and can slow down time. Tomb Jumped and raised his fist in the airtime was slowing down he kick Sanguine in the head. He brought time to normal and threw a knife into his shoulder Sanguine fell clutching where the knife hit.

" I hope Skul killed you but this is the most fun I have had in years goodbye pa." Tomb revealed a straight razor the was Identical to Bill ray's

" You kept it " Sanguine said weakly but smiling.

" Yes I dipped it in that thing under Gordon's house made it a god killer and now you will die from the Razor you gave to me when I was born. Tomb turned it on and sliced Billy's throat he scream and blood came out of his empty eyeholes and his mouth and throat.

He put a rag on top of his body. 5 minuets later Sanctuary operatives swarmed the area including The Grand Mage and Skulduggery and his Gang.

" You did well your lucky you killed him." Bloodstains said

" I never killed anyone just because he is my pa does not mean I am a bad guy myself. Now where is my 50 million?" Tomb smiled

Skulduggery and Valkyrie Approached

" I should have told you guys I was going to do that but I didn't want him to suspect a trap."

" How did it feel killing your own dad" Valkyrie asked

" Not bad he was evil after all."

" I have business to attend to be back soon" Skulduggery said and left.

" I knew we would survive." Valkyrie said

" Are you going to tell me now " Valkyrie said

" Yes you ready?" Tomb said.

" Yes I am "

" I am your long lost cousin"

" No way then you are Dom is that you Dominic Edgely?"

" Yes Stephanie It's me we used to have so much fun."

"Good times weren't they."

Valkyrie Pulled him in for a long a heart full kiss


End file.
